Again excuse errors of spelling, grammar and retarded sentence structure. Internet costs and I don't have time to proof read.
Last minute with her. wahh
So sold the bike back in Ho Chi Minh, Vietnam (nearly 3 weeks ago now) for an alright price for the state it was in. Lost the registration card out of my pocket on the way and some local picked it up and I got it back eventually. Lucky! Bike is worth nothing without it remember. Headed off to Phnom Penh in Cambodia, with some friends from back home. Pretty standard boring trip of unknown length and time. Arriving in Phnom Penh was quite the change from Vietnam, barbed wire fences, slightly more run down, and had a dodgy feeling to it, guess that's how it is when you have one if the most corrupt governments in the world. My haggling resulted in some tuk tuk drivers wanting to kill me as i let them fight out between themselves who would get my $1. Achieved to cheapest tuk tuk of the trip however. Great reward. Our accom was lakeside, well used to be lake side. It's now filled in thanks to Korean investors, apparently it's going to be made into a swimming lake but more likely buildings thanks to thee old corrupt government. For those of you who don't know Cambodia was overrun by the Khmer rouge in 1975. This killed 1/4 of the population (same as Auckland being wiped of the map, that could be a bonus for NZ actually) mainly through starvation and executions because people were intellectuals, worked for old government or had glasses. The whole population was forced into the rice fields, no western influence was allowed, boarders shut off and 1975 was declared year zero by pol pot leader of the Khmer rouge, talking to the man of 49 years of age at the guest house topic soon leads to Khmer rouge, as he lists off the family members killed on his fingers, father, mother, uncle, brother..... 8 in total. It's crazy to think that our parents would most likely have died as well under Khmer rouge control. This was a good intro into our 2 attractions for the next day, Choung Ek Killing Fields and Tuol Sleng s21 slaughter house. The Choung Ek fields are were 16000 bodies were found, minimal killed with bullets. Most killed from knifes, spades, wagon axles to the head, or a tree which served as a nice place to swing a baby into to kill it. Teeth and bone remains are still common and clothes are slowly emerging through the soil after rain. Barbaric stuff that only occurred 35 years ago.
Choung Ek
Next stop was Tuol Sleng prison, or s21 as it's commonly called. An old school turned into a torture house. Eating faeces, finger nails removed, teeth removed, skinning alive, electric shocks, waterboarding, burning mouth resulting in starvation are only a handful if techniques used to force people held captive into making confessions. Kerry Hamil, a Nzer and one of the few westerners killed was found he wrote a 4000 word essay that he was a CIA spy, all he was was a sailor who had strayed into Cambodian waters. Photographs on the numerous victims grace the walls. Some look as they are already dead due to starvation, kids, women, they are all there. Only 7 out of 16000+ survived the prison when the Vietnamese eventually captured Phnom Penh. Living conditions were horrendous, would make Mt Eden prison seem like a 5 star resort. Sure some Wikipediaing of Khmer Rouge, Pol Pot, s21 prison and Comrade Duch will lead you to some further reading. And many of you would have seen the movie 'The Killing Fields' currently reading through a book 'First They Killed My Father' about a survivor, sister died of diarrhea because they killed all the doctors and nurses, children dying because they are so hungry they eat poisonous mushrooms, 8 grains of rice for lunch for your 14 hour days in the field. Father mother sister sister brother all killed. Had the option of going to army shooting ranges where you can shot ak's, m60's, rocket launchers and coconuts and rumour has it even humans (prisoners on death sentence) corrupt country, money talks and you can do anything.... For a price. I've done the Rambo thing before and don't have the funds of a gungho texan gun addict, but if I win lotto I'll be back.
Children - all killed
Finger nailing
State of the people on the left just screws with your mind. All still alive no doubt
Death Death Death
Was nice to leave Phnom that afternoon and head to the Siem Reap to visit the great temples of Angkor Wat which will offer some lighter topics.
Cheers google, did it justice
I'm not a fan of the tourists spots but Angkor Wat is one that you cannot pass through Cambodia without going to. Tomb raider made one of them famous. Rented myself a pedal bike for $1 from my $1 a night accom (thankkk you exchange rate) and headed out on the overcast but still f-ing hot day. Paid for my outrageously expensive 3 day pass at the gate and was greeted by the circus. Tourists everywhere by the thousands. It would seem Nikon and Canon have a secure hold on the dslr camera market. People taking photos of rocks and anything. And just horrible fashion, imagine running shoes, with either jeans/shorts your dad would wear, pasty legs and either a rancid shirt or one that says 'I love Cambodia', walking waterfalls present (fat Americans drowning themselves in forehead sweat) I just resulted taking photos of these strange human people. The temples are absolutely amazing but the invention of the camera, the tour bus and the international plane has ruined it. And Google Images has better photos than i could ever take. Only ended up using a day of my 3 day pass, getting a 7 day one would be a death sentence. I enjoy temples and history but exploring the numerous temple complexes in the heat and dust and seeing yet another Japanese tourist pull the peace sign in a cheesy photo made me happy to leave.
Filth in numbers, tourists - yuk
owwwww, photo of rock
awwwwww
Righto Jacky Chan
Taking photo of a door, standard
My only temple shot
Kill me
Poor children
Work it
Now please select a song that would feature as my soundtrack for the next 2 weeks. This music just companies the Asian dance scene, beaches, sand and great nights extremely well. Yes there was other music from euro trash, drum and bade but this stuff goes off all day everyday. Sorry you alty readers who cannot listen to mainstream music, you can read in silence. Shame.
(From top to bottom are my personal choices)
Xmas eve was spent in a bar doing new Zealand drinking culture proud, so was Christmas night, a firm emphasis for me was to get some locals involved and smashing a bucket with them helps, boxing day was a much needed rest day. Left on the morning of the 27th, via bus to Bangkok, 1.5 hours later and we had covered under a kilometer. Plastic chairs down the isles due to overloading, this soon killed the strut of unlucky guy we picked up, 5 star hotel to a plastic chair. Even ran out of plastic chairs so 5 star guy had someone on his lap until another one was sourced. Laughter went up in the bus. Trip was suppose to take 6 hours, took 12 including 2 hours in gridlock Bangkok. Shared it with some scarfie otago 4th year girls. Fowl language and southern swag makes them easy to distinguish. Arriving in Bangkok the plan was to make a day of shit travel into a night of diarrhea travel (sure that's the superlative of shit) and continue all the way to south Thailand islands, trains full, buses full, flights too expensive, I gave up but after some noodles had soothed my stomach I gave it one last try. Placed on a waiting list. There was hundreds of people in the same boat as me. All stranded. I however got more lucky than a armless blind man finding a needle in a haystack (yes WTF but it's all I can think of) And got the last ticket out of Bangkok, to the wrong island but I would sort that out later. Night bus so no accom costs, beautiful! Bus was nice but so nice is was shit to sleep in due to ergonomically retarded seats. Having a fucking European asshole recline is chair right back infront of me just added to the issues. Arrived to catch the ferry to koh Toa island at 5am, 2 hour wait till 7am sailing. Arriving at koh Tao after a rough boat trip and multiple spewings from stupid English people who didn't know the look at the horizon trick. Got another ticket and headed to my correct island, a some what smoother trip. Arrived, 30 hours of non stop traveling on a few hours of half assed sleep on the bus and a small plate of rice and noodles. The post travel feed was decent but stomach couldn't handle the amount of food that was going down.
Koh Phangan is home to the biggest beach party in the world, spent 2 days on the hippie chilled side of the island where I befriended some French dudes, one is coming to nz soon so you may meet? Lived in a beach side bungalow, a pipe out of the wall for a shower, hammock out front and a stone throw away from the palm tree lined beach. and then 2 nights at party central surrounded by Geordie shore meatheads and roided up faggots. Island pretty much survives off the Full Moon parties everyone month. Spent new year in front of Tommy Resort (how sick is that for a resort name) Days were spent chilling, nights drinking, even managed a beach semi-coma in true Thailand style after mellow mountain bar and a jungle party. Yup. I could yarn ages about full moon buts it's amazing and shits on rhythm and vines. Easily, sorry NZ. It's a shame all the English scum come over as they kill the chilled vibe the island would have once had. A classic toilet moment with someone who after a series of question it was gathered that he is from NZ lives in CHCH, went to Otago, went to the same school he recalls my name I recall his 6th form when I was 3rd form. Small world. Gotta love little old NZ. Everyone knows everyone. Freaky when you are halfway across the world.
Off to the mainland to the west coast. Had 2 nights in Krabi and a feast on the last night thanks to beach find of $80nz (cheers fi) visited some amazing beaches, did some dodgy shallow cliff jumping with some Thais, got to drive one of those traditional Thai boats. All g.
Then of to Koh Phi Phi, day trip turned into night trip turned into 3 day bender for me. A beach party every night insured good times.
Cheers again Google. But I cannot do it justice
Scored a dorm room with 16 beds each room. Cheap beers from the fruit store next door was a bonus. But the biggest bonus was waking up to a banging Swedish girls next to you, above you, diagonally above you and behind you made it special. But you can't judge a book by it's cover and it's common knowledge around the male backpacking circles that most Swedish girls are stuck up bitches. This was correct, they didn't have the personality of a Harry Potter book, and even the Thai owner was happy to see them leave. I dabbled in a few conversations though, hard not to. First full day we visted the beach made famous by the movie of the same name. Pretty amazing stuff, shame about all the tourists. First night was spent with nz friends at an Irish pub, and one Danish girl got lucky, we'll say Scandinavian. Sounds so much better. And damm scandinavians are fine. Like wow, thanks to whoever drunkenly assisted me? Maybe you Anna? Sadly no last name so the facebook stalk cannot go down. Fuck. (Dean you can try; Natalie from Copenhagen) NZ friends made the fatal error of booking accom in advance back in Krabi so had to leave but I stayed. Formed a wee crew from the dorm room consisting of 2 Americans (one a 27 year old former golf pro) an Aussie, 2 loose Irish girls (one achieved 7pm to 11am drinking, her downfall was the bottle of whisky she brought at 10am for breakfast), handful of Canadians, a even looser swedish kid and a mint saffa girl. Perks of dorm rooming! Events included swedish guy nearly getting totaled by Thai kick boxer for stealing a bottle of whisky, Canadian saved the day. Canadian saying 'laaaady maaasssage' to a local resulting in a minor scuffle, the downing of numerous buckets and beers, laughing at sunburnt lobster American after the fatal error of buying coconut based watered down sunscreen and numerous other stuff I just can't remember. Most of the day was spent lounging, people watching and beaching. Played a traditional Irish drinking game of guess where a random person is from. This is most cases was just guessing where the hottest girl in a 20m radius was from. Rules were set that you had to ask one with a boyfriend leading to just pure awkwardness when you had to chase them down and ask. Sounds lame but wasn't.
Buckets
Koh Phi Phi from air.. thank Google
Went to watch some Thai boxing, more like tourist Thai boxing where you get a free bucket if you volunteer to fight. Watching a guy my size get shat on by a white Jake the muss put me off. But if any of you become lightweight boxers head to phi phi and demo some Geordie shore faggots. Love to try see them g.t.l from a hospital bed. Phi phi is the goods, guttered I had to leave. The island sucks more money than a high maintenance girlfriend but still cheap as chips compared to nz. living below the backpacking poverty line for 2 months and having to spend $15 a night on your tropical island accommodation with some of the best beaches in the world and $2 on a 640ml beer instead of $1.20, it's rough on the financial heart inside.
Left for Phuket next day was going to go to Phuket Town but meet Australian girl from dorm and was cheaper to go further away so headed to patong on the other side of the island with her. I'm not the person to travel with if you have an itinery, mine changes every few minutes. Neons, music, seedy Americans, massage parlors everywhere, fat whites with skinny Thai girls, bars 60m long with pole dancing on every table, plastic surgery present everywhere including the 'snip' on the lady boys. This is Thailand. So it would be safe to say this place is probably the core of the hiv/aids epidemic. Aussie and I were craving some food so we hit one of the 9 McDonalds up on the island. First western meal in a longtime. Even got a McPork burger. Tasty. Fatal error of supersizing my combo though. Had a small walk around by myself, offered 'beautiful lady' every few minutes, sadly had to decline those STD ridden sluts. The walk later with Australian makes it easier as we look like boyfriend/girlfriend so get left alone. Pretty freaky she is only 19 and solo. Even a drink spiking hasn't put her off. Gb.
Off to Burma for maybe 15min tomorrow, need a visa extension meaning have to cross into another country. For those out of the know a visa is not a credit card (like i used to think) but a stamp in your passaporto (Italian for passport, learn something new everyday) allowing you to enter a country. Mine runs out soon but you get an extra 15 days if you leave the country then re enter over a land boarder. Shall explain this crazy loophole. 6am start, shit sleep due to music, off to the street to wait for van, I would be busing but forked out a bit more so I could maybe make Bangkok in some reasonable hour by catching the bus from the boarder later in the day. Van arrives on time, semi full, first stop is to pick up pedo old American with David Bain glasses and hawaian shirt, 90's heavy fabric bodyglove style board shorts you would get from the warehouse, receeding hair line and rear bald patch. He has obviously worked on the look and has it down. Now the drive. Pedo now asleep and snoring. Hot Italian next to him ain't happy. Went over the same vomit inducing stretch of road 5 times picking people up. Drive drive drive, bash a bag of chips for breakfast. Drive drive. Arrive at Ranong we get stamped out of Thailand, get on a boat, stop at an island halfway over river where driver takes passport and does god knows what. Now carry on to myanmar. 10min boat trip over the river. En route we get handed a crisp unmarked uncreased $10 us bill to pay to get into burma. If your bill ain't new you aren't getting visa. You crease it and your fucked. Was sooooo tempted to crease. Arrive on Myanmar soil, get stamped in, get stamped out in one go and back on boat. Driver jumps back on with his brick of duty free ciggies which he will no doubt mow through in a few days. 7min in a new country. Beautiful. To another island where Thai military checks that our boat isn't human trafficking, piss poor check to be fair, i could have been hiding babies in my shirt. Back to mainland Thailand and stamped in with 15 more days to have fun! Such a weird system yet there are businesses based on it and locals make a living driving the boats. Strange seeing that nearly every female has skin whitening cream smothered on their faces, western culture and looks are here to stay.
Thai port
Immigration island 1#
Hello Myanmar
Pure WTF, sure the governement can hire a proof reader.
I asked Thai driver numerous times to drop me at the bus stop by Thai/Burma boarder, yes yes yes I get from him. I had paid for a return trip because you couldn't pay for a one way. To cut a long story short I never got dropped at bus station but have ended back in Phuket some 300km further away from Bangkok than I should be. Missed all the bangkok buses from Phuket by 10min so have to spend another night in this party town, more money sucked out of my limited funds.
Thank you @asiawebdirect for this image of Patong. Pretty standard
Off to Bangkok on a 18 hour bus ride, could be 12 but saving $12 by taking longer. Extreme budgeting! This could be a professional sport. That $12 was spent on a maccas sundae, dinner and accom and there will be some for breakfast. So and extra 6 hours will be worth it. Hopefully. The night consisted of buying some new clothes, cheaper to buy than do washing. Offered 'laaaaaady massage' easily 30 times tonight, groped by a ladyboy. Patong is loose, a few days in this town would satisfy anyone. All the shop keepers say 'giddy mate' in a clean as aussie accent. bulk Aussies here, and you can see why they have a horrible travel rep. Few even know Kia Ora as they try sell me their fake Rugby World Cup jerseys. No thanks. RWC was soo last year. Morning consisted of breakfast and watching seedy men kiss goodbye their Thai stick figure ladies after an eventful night no doubt. Minivan leaves 1.5 hours late yet arrives 1.5 hours early for bus transfer. WTF. Thais can drive like crazy when the want and not stopping at restaurants where the driver will get a commission from bringing in customers. At transfer building a random dog sniffs out some weed, this soon gets divided up between workers and sold off to keen tourists. Classic shit again. Isreali gives advice 'that it will make the trip nice', in a voice coming from a dreadlocked hippie, got to know him pretty well. The kids at the transfer were pumping some of the similar tunes mentioned before. Gave them my ipod and selected my highly rated Monkey Bar playlist. Fuck who needed Full Moon when you have bus station. Yarned to some 18 year old Italian babes, while they smoked away, something nice about a young Italians smoking ciggies and talked in that goddess accent, so sophisticated and hot. Felt like James Bond. They have been hitting trance parties for a month, gave them my Vietnam sim card which is no use to me. So now have a mint condition Samsung phone, a great town phone, load her with a Vodafone sim card and you can spade all night without the worry of losing your precious iPhone or Blackberry while cutting lose in Monkey Bar or Aikmens to those same global dance hits. Bidding starts at a bag of chips and onion soup dip which I badly crave right now.
On bus... Fast and furious 5 is on, i'm a sucker for every sentence of ghetto talk line that comes out if ludacris's mouth so had to watch. Sleeping pill..... Outies...... Zz.... Wake up - Bangkok, so drugged up overnight I can't recall if it was a dream or not that I got spicy chicken on rice, if i did, wasn't the best.
How you dry clothes with a standard office fan, a tv cord and a chair. Dayum
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